Follow Me to the Senior Center – Home of the Brave

By Carl and Jo Ann Hauser
Originally I was going to title this article ‘Life is Hard.’ Now I’m not talking about every day, normal irritations. For example, have you ever noticed when driving down our mountain, everybody else is either driving too fast or too slow? With the limited number of places to pass, it can get very annoying. Fortunately, most of us Seniors don’t participate in road rage. We’re not going to cut anybody off or pick a fight. If for no other reason than it’s just too hard to get out of the car! Besides, with tinted windows we can yell and make hand gestures all we want . . . no one would be the wiser. When we turn sixty-five and retire, we expect that life will be good. We can sleep in, travel, and visit grandchildren. Sometimes life gets in the way.

I want to honor my friends who this year in particular are going through some very serious battles. With bravery, dignity, humor, and few complaints my friends have been dealing with such things as cancer, heart problems, Legionnaire’s disease, blindness, and broken bones. Betty, BJ, Sonny, Dennis, Carey, Austin, Jerry, Jerrilyn, Mary Lou, Dub, Chris, and Gloria, my friends, this article is dedicated to you.

Having said that, the stories on how Gloria and Jerrilyn broke their bones are a little thin. Saying, “I just fell, and my wrist broke,” or, “I just fell, and my leg broke,” just doesn’t cut it. Here’s what REALLY happened! In Gloria’s case it was early in the morning. Randy was feeling a little frisky, and started chasing Gloria around the bedroom. You would think after 71 years of marriage Randy would know he can’t catch her! After three or four laps around the bedroom, Gloria ran up the stairs for her morning coffee, and THAT’S when she fell!

Now, Jerrilyn’s case is much more mysterious. She claims she was just walking across the parking lot between Big Daddy’s and her Alta Vista Motel, when she found herself suddenly on the ground with a broken leg. Here’s what she didn’t see- Cloudcroft has a shadowy underworld. Nocturnal events are going on every night that are unimaginable. It’s called The Raccoon Rodeo. Usually the party breaks up at dawn; this particular morning it was running late. The last event of the Rodeo is always ‘Lasso a Texas Tourist.’ Our sweet Jerrilyn was mistaken for a Texan, and roped to the ground by one ornery raccoon. Most of you haven’t heard of The Raccoon Rodeo. Some of the other events are ‘Tree Climbing,’ ‘Pine Cone Tossing,’ ‘Bear Back Riding,’ and ‘Elk Busting.’ The concession stand always opens immediately after the ‘Dumpster Diving’ contest. The variety of food may vary, but they usually have great deals like Day-Old Pizza for a quarter, Rotten Apples are just a dime, and you can Lick a Pie Pan for just a nickel. The Raccoon Rodeo- coming to a dumpster near you!

Fortunately for Jerrilyn there were twelve EMTs training across the street. The firemen ran across the street to her aid, and the raccoons scattered. So, how many EMTs does it take to load Jerrilyn into an ambulance? (You think I’m about to get in trouble, right?) One to load; eleven to supervise!

One of my favorite commercials is the talking camel walking through the office. He’s asking all his buddies what day it is. Finally he comes to this girl who pauses, and with a big sigh she says, “It’s hump-day.” To all my friends who have been through so much this year, may it be hump-day for you all. As we are saved by Grace, we wish to live by the Spirit, and radiate love, which you all do so well.

So let’s review what we’ve learned. 1) Be Spirit-filled, not unfulfilled; 2) If you have a Texas accent, beware after dark; 3) Day-old pizza is not that bad; 4)If you’re seeing talking camels, you may want to cut back on those pain killers; 5) The Don’t Mess with Texas crowd hasn’t met a Cloudcroft raccoon; 6) and . . . Jo Ann is still not shaving her legs!

Check with the Senior Center for availability of Raccoon Rodeo calendars and great Raccoon Rodeo souvenirs, such as Chicken Bones, Moldy Bread, and Empty Beer Cans. While you are there sign up for lunch and some of our other great activities, or call 682-3022. Marrianne has added monthly fun trips for your enjoyment: shopping in Las Cruces or El Paso, movie matinees, a visit to the casino. The van goes to Alamogordo for shopping on Monday and Tuesday. Come to the Center to exercise, play Bridge, Mexican Train, or Farkle with friends. And, always check out our website that Marty Ware so cleverly keeps updated. Beware the raccoon ~ God bless!

Leave a Reply